The time of help and comfort from others in my situation has ended. Our monthly women's group is no more. Perhaps it may make a come back with the new staff and I sure hope it does because surrounding yourself with a group of people who have or are going through the trauma you are is incredibly powerful.. To sit amongst those who understand your feelings, thoughts, actions, responses and emotions, it's healing.
During our last group we were asked to write a letter. This letter was suppose to be written to others going through what we were going through, a letter of encouragement. Lessons we have learned along the way, lights at the end of the tunnel, things that have helped us get by. Things that could apply to any traumatic experience, any challenging life event, any struggle you are going through, or when you feel life has you down and out.
I struggled to formulate the words into a letter, not because I didn't know what to say but more so because there was so much. There was so much flowing through my mind that I just had to write. I have over 9 years of traumatic experience, you could say I have learned a few lessons on the way. You could say I know a million ways to encourage others. A part of encouraging others is being resilient.
Resilience is a word often said to me, usually in response to how a person describes me. I am resilient because of all the lessons I have learned. I am resilient because I kept encouraging myself to move, to get up everyday and find the little things that made my heart connect to life. As the words flowed through my mind, I wrote down over 20 phrases of encouragement and wanted to share them. Perhaps you are going through a tough time and need some encouraging words. Take what you need and pass along to others what they may need.
1. Keep going
2. Always take the high road
3. Keep your head up
4. Keep fighting for what you believe in
5. Find you
6. Rediscover you
7. Have patience and be easy on yourself
8. Try something new
9. Make time for you
10. Organize your life
11. Discover new passions
12. Believe in yourself
13. You are capable
14. You can do this
15. It will get better
16. Don't be daft, standup
17. Ask for help
18. Look for support
19. Seek out resources
20. Invest in you
21. Take the time you need
22. Find your new path/journey
23. Take a break before you break
24. Take care of you
25. Listen to yourself
Take what you need. Maybe you need all of it, take it. Write them on sticky notes and hang them around the house. Hang them in your car, at your desk at work. Remind yourself of these words from someone who has been through a few traumatic events. Focus on these. Read them aloud, read them 10 times a day. Make it part of your routine to read these daily. Make it a part of your day to write these out daily. Write 1, write 25, whatever you need, make it a part of your daily routine. Let these be your connection to life.
These will help you through your trauma and allow you to see the other side. The blessing with trauma is, it typically destroys a person so much that you get to start over again. Not many people get the chance to start over again. Take that chance and go with it. Allow yourself the opportunity to take the sour and make it sweet. It would be nice to live in a world where trauma didn't happen but unfortunately it does, that doesn't mean you can't take those life altering experiences and make something powerful and magical out of them. It won't be easy, take it day by day and remember to encourage yourself. The encouragement of others is only a small piece of recovery, encouragement of oneself is more powerful, it makes more of an impact so take what you need and remind yourself of it daily.
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